The Comparison Complex

“Do not compare yourself with anyone”, is the fortieth of the fifty-five maxims of Father Thomas Hopko. I chose it for today’s lines, as a sample of his maxims, for a variety of reasons, among which is that it makes us feel that it is both private and public, that is, it will benefit you if you apply it to others as well, the wife, the children… Do not compare your wife with another woman, do not compare your son… In my attempt to explain Hopko’s maxim, I do not mean to project on it what he does not mean in it. He did not mean to foster individualism, for instance, but rather to teach us to ward off the comparison complex that does nothing other than make us forget that God loves us as we are, and distracts us from thanking Him for His goodness. Moreover, Hopko is not telling anyone of us: “you are greater than those you see in the world”. He is not commending pride. There are ugly things in us that we do not see in others, and we must get rid of them. God has honored every human being with His love. In His eyes, he is unique. If we truly believe this, it will save us from the complex!